I tendered advice to a parent seeking to prepare his (her) first-grade child for JEE.

Mr./Ms. Unnamed Parent

I have, in accordance with my newfound penchant for courtly conduct, decided to presume rectitude on your part, to the extent that I am prepared to not regard your question as intending to elicit an irate response so as to lead you to revel in nonesuch mischievous fun. It may be anachronistic of me to pen a response in the format of a letter, but I trust you shall pardon me for my continuing fascination with the quaint ways of the learned.

Supposing that you have indeed a child enrolled in first grade (I suppose so for I do not share the suspicions that you are what modernity, devoid of class, may term an unlucky vestal), I should deem the health of your mental child of utmost importance to so dutiful a parent as you. He ought to make friends and play so as to refine his social skills.

However, I am fully seized of your concern for your child. Competition runs galore in the unforgiving world of employment, and having your child trained from the outset may yield rich fruit in the future. For the greater good, it is perfectly commendable for your child to morph from the detestably smiling and laughing delight that he would normally be into a passive automaton; so absorbed in trigonometry, projectile motion and nucleophilic substitution reactions, that he might fall in his books, as if submerged in quicksand.

At the same time, you must devote attention to his grasping power. It may not be possible for him to master that very syllabus which is close to six times in length when compared with the tenth grade syllabus. In such an event, you may enroll him for special classes and sap him of all his energy and creativity, his eyes morphed from wellsprings of lively radiance into listless depths of stressful toil, for the greater good.

I regret that I cannot be of greater aid, for I am not personally well-versed with such counselling. I do sincerely hope, however, that I have at bare minimum offered some nebulous perspective.

Yours Euphuistically.